Each day is seems I turn on the TV and there is yet another story of innocent lives lost. As I drive by the municipal buildings, the flags are at half mast, again another reminder that people don’t always love one another. And then I turned to Facebook and read an article about a young Mom losing her young son that rocked me to my core. Even weeks later it still has had a profound affect on me.
Since my son was born and especially my divorce, I have often been criticized for doing to much for my son, buying him too many things, so giving in to his wishes too often….for actually loving him too much. First of all, any mother that has to share custody of their children will understand my need to want to make up for the lost time when he is at his father’s. Any mother that has lost a child, I am sure would support me in my need to ensure every short moment we have together is not wasted.
I lost my twin sister when we were just about to turn 8 years old, so just getting my son to that age was very weighing on me. In my head, I just needed to get him 8, and then I could breathe a sigh of relief, if just for a moment.
I know that Mom’s are supposed to support each other but I know that there is often a lot of criticism if your parenting ways are not the same as others. But, I am willing to face the criticism to love my son to much.
I will:
Let him sleep with me at night if he wants. Soon he will be old enough to not want to sleep with him Mom and those cuddles will be a thing of the past.
Let him have treats after dinner (obviously in moderation). What’s the old saying “Life is too short, eat dessert first.”?
Let him stay up late once and a while watching TV together. Soon Mom won’t be cool to hang out with, so I will let him enjoy these moments as much as I do.
Let him act overly silly and boisterous when he needs to and letting him be the kid he wants to be.
Take him on little trips and activities as often as I can. I can’t afford week long vacations to Disney or the islands, so let’s enjoy what I can afford.
Attend every extracurricular, every practice, every school event because soon enough college/university will call and there won’t be any of these events.
Let him have some extra screen time and stay in his pajamas all day when just wants to have a lazy day. As adults, we all know that life can move to fast and we all want some downtime every one and a while.
Keep all his art work (rivaling a hoarder) so that when he’s older I can look back and enjoy.
Buy him toys and little gifts when it’s not his birthday or Christmas or any holiday. Just because I want to.
Smother him with hugs and kisses until he tells me to stop. I don’t see him every day, so this Mom has to make up for lost time.
And I will love him too much any way I know how because I am reminded day in and day out how short life can be and I don’t ever want to have that “if I only I showed him I loved him more” moment.
cathyunfiltered.com 