The other day I had a party.  Guest count = 1.

It was one of those days when I just wanted to wallow and feel sorry for myself.  I wanted to think about everything that I wasn’t happy about in my life and about and be miserable about it.  I didn’t want to put on my smiley face and pretend everything was perfect.   I didn’t invite anyone to my party, I didn’t want them there either.  I wanted to feel even lonelier and having people there wouldn’t help.  I didn’t want to leave the house.  I just wanted to be 100% miserable!

My very own personal pity party!!

What was I so upset about?  I was sick of feeling alone, I was tired of seeing everyone else with their significant others all happy and loving and I didn’t have my own person, I was missing my boy as it was Daddy’s weekend, I was mad about that whole situation and how there is nothing I can do to change it, I was tired of constantly feeling tired,  I was tired of losing the same 5lbs only over and over again, I was tired of looking in the mirror and not being happy what I saw, I was unhappy about not having enough money ever, I was tired of feeling like a broken record with my complaints to my family and friends, I was tired of seeing all the bad things happening in the world on TV.  It was everything and anything.

And then, like a kid’s birthday party, it was over in a couple of hours.

I got up, brushed myself off and said “damn it, get over it”.   Sure, everything isn’t picture perfect, but I have so many things in my life to happy and thankful about.

I have:

1. A son who is my absolute world.  Just thinking about him brings the biggest smile to my face and warms my heart.
2. A family that is always there to listen to me and love me, no matter what.
3. Friends that listen to my broken record and always make me feel welcome.  No 5th wheel.
4. A roof over my head, food in my belly and clothes on my back.
5. A job to go to each day so I can provide for myself and my son.
6. My health and so much more……..

There are so many others out there that can’t say they have some of or any of these things, so I am truly blessed.  Dwelling what I don’t have, doesn’t solve anything and is no way to live life and definitely not a kind of life I ever want my son to be subjected too.

It was a great party that I needed to have and now it is over.  My only last complaint, I didn’t get a looty bag at the end of this party.  😦